Some say Liquor is Quicker

In 1931, Ogden Nash published a poem entitled “Reflections on Ice Breaking”. It’s only a couple quick lines: Candy is Dandy; but, liquor is quicker. And, to this day, Some say Liquor is quicker without even knowing where the saying came from. When we hear it, it invokes images of Mae West and WC Fields, who may or may not have used the line. And, Gene Wilder, famously used it in a scene from Willy Wonka in 1971. But, what if you could combine the two? A little sweetness in your booze? That’s what we celebrate today. It’s national Liqueur day. While liquor is a broad category, liqueur narrows that field. Generally speaking, liqueurs are a base liquor sweetened and/or seasoned with other flavors, oils, or extracts.

Rum, whiskey, Brandy, vodka, gin, and tequila are “base” liquors. These are pure unadulterated alcoholic beverages. Meanwhile, Liqueurs are like candy coated booze. These are the “mixers” that make for some of the most fun drinks, or; just drink them on their own. Some classic examples are Grand Marnier, Kalhua, and Baileys. The three of those combined make a drink called a B52, usually served as a shot. And, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. There are Apple, Pear, coffee, and other brandies. Liqueurs come in many bases with multiple variations on the theme. There are coffee, berry, fruit, flowery, herbal, spicy, chocolate, creams, honey, and more. Some are more pleasing than others. Yagermeister, famously, caused you to make a face because it’s so bitter. But, most aim to bring a smile to your face.

There are so many reasons some say liquor is quicker

Since most liqueurs tend to be sweet, They go down easily. This is not an accident. The way liqueurs evolved traces back to medicine men and our good friends the monks (the same guys who brought us champagne, Belgian ale, and Benedictine). Most alcohol based drinks started as medicine. Take hot buttered rum, a staple at ski resorts. It started as a prophylaxis against harsh New England winter colds in colonial days. That is relatively modern history, though. As far back as 7000 BC, Chinese archeological sites revealed Rice wine liquor flavored with honey and grapes used for medicinal purposes. Just like Mary Poppins singing about a spoonful of sugar making the medicine go down, earlier pioneers of alcoholic beverages sweetened them to make them more palatable.

Today, we don’t disguise it as medicinal. Adult beverage producers, specifically, try to make the most appealing liqueurs they can. The point is to make it so tasty that people will drink lots of it, quickly. Whether it’s straight shots of Jager or Goldschlager, or, Mixed drinks like white Russians, Espresso martinis, and woo woo, It’s like adult kids in a candy store. Although some say candy is dandy and liquor is quicker, Having a bit of both helps some on the way to loosening inhibitions. And, the names of some liqueur based cocktails reflect the aim: Sex on the beach, screaming orgasm, between the sheets, slippery nipple, and more all demonstrate one thing: an adolescent desire to fulfill lustful urges by use of candy flavored liquor. The sweet drinks go down like soda pop, while intoxicating the user and loosening inhibitions. It’s the classic girl drink drunk scenario.

Still medicinal in some ways

How many times have we heard someone say I need a good stiff drink? The common impetus for this comment is usually stress or other mental health issue. Hence, although it’s self administered, alcohol still serves a medicinal purpose. But, not everyone appreciates a “good stiff drink”. And, if the point is to make you feel better, why not use a sweet beverage? You know it’s technically’ not good for you, so, why not add some sugar (which is also not good for you)? And, if you really want a medicinal boost, there are a number of liqueurs using a base of botanicals and herbs, which we know from Eastern medicinal practices can be beneficial. Think of things like absinthe, chartreuse, and Domaine Canton ginger liqueur.

And, you don’t have to drink them straight (although you can). Making a mixed drink is analogous to a pharmacist compounding a unique medicine by combining several different ingredients to create different and wide ranging effects than the individual components. Whether you are stressed or happy, alcohol has the ability to intensify those emotions. So, if you’re feeling depressed, and you slink off into a corner with a bottle of night train, you’ll only intensify that feeling of self loathing. But, if you mix Frangelico and Godiva white chocolate liqueur, you will, effectively, feel happier. Just remember that when you self medicate. A foofy drink with a little umbrella could be just what you need.

So let’s celebrate Adult Candy

Some of you may remember the Comedy Central show: Strangers with Candy. Jerri Blank was a boozer, a user, and a loser. She took self medication to new lows. But, throughout the show, she had valuable life lessons, most of which she didn’t learn from. Perhaps, if she used liqueur instead of home made drugs in the hot fruit, things would get better. Because, let’s face it: Liqueur is really adult candy, isn’t it? So, what do you say? Let’s get our sweet tooth on and celebrate national Liqueur day in Style, not Jerri Blank style. Start with your favorite liqueur, or discover a new one.

There are hundreds, even thousands of types of liquors. And, they fall into different categories. While this is not a complete list, for simplification purposes, there are a handful of broad categories with multiple examples in each category. Coffee, chocolate, fruit, cream, creme (like creme de menthe, cacao, and cassis, not to be confused with cream liqueurs), Floral, herbal, nut based, honey based, and others based on base liquors like flavored whiskey, brandy, rum, vodka, gin, and tequila (Think coconut rum, sloe gin, and Irish mist). You probably have some liqueur in your store right now. If not, go visit your local purveyor of fine spirits and start experimenting. Whether it’s straight or mixed, enjoy.

Some ideas to get you started:

• Say it again: Equal parts Soju (Korean rice liqueur), Chartreuse, Lime Juice, and Luxardo Cherry, garnish with lime.
• B52: 1 Shot each, Kahlua, Baileys, and Grand Marnier. Traditionally, You float the three liqueurs by weight, so it creates layers.
• Appletini: 2 oz vodka, 2 oz Apple liqueur, 1 oz Lime Juice, 1 oz simple syrup. Garnish with sugar rim and apple slice.
• Sex on the Beach: Equal Parts Vodka, Peach Schnapps, Orange Juice, and cranberry juice, a spritz of grenadine, and orange and cherry garnish.

These are just a few drinks. But, you can play around all day with different liqueurs. Try Muddling some berries, sugar, and fresh herbs, add in some grand marnier, vodka, and Midori for a melon berry cocktail to bring back summer if only for a little while. Either way, remember to celebrate national liqueur day, and keep proving Liquor is quicker.