Homey Don’t Brew Like Dat

Looking for something to do at home this weekend? Sunday is Mother’s day. But, Saturday is a day for dads and beer lovers alike. It has nothing to do with flowers, cards, or mimosas. It’s national homebrew day! And, that’s something to really celebrate. If you’re a seasoned brewer, it comes easy. But, if you have never tried it, today is as good a day as any to start. A word of warning: there will be people who tell you you have to use XYZ ingredients, and get in your face about ABV, SG, PA, AAU, CFC, DME, LME, FG, and dozens of other acronyms. Don’t get flustered. Just tell them: Homey Don’t Brew Like Dat. As the kids say today: you do you (What? they don’t say that?).

If you want to run a successful brewing company, you will want to have consistency. All of your beers will need to follow strict procedures, protocols, and conform to the standards and style of the brand. But, we aren’t talking about running a brewery here. You know who has some of the best protocols and consistency in product? Companies like Budweiser, Miller, and Pabst. As they say in Australia, though, American beer is like sex in a canoe (It’s f’in’ close to water). But, today isn’t about mass production brewing on an international or even regional scale. We’re all about home brewing.

And, the beauty of home brewing is like home cooking: it’s about heart, experimentation, and creating a one of a kind experience. So, if you are following a recipe that says simmer your wort at 160 degrees for 45 minutes, know that if you go an extra 5 minutes or simmer at 175 degrees, you’re going to be fine. In fact, it may even come out better.

Homey Don’t Brew Like Dat. But, he does what works.

The people who pelt you with acronyms and scientific jargon about brewing are the same smug hipsters obsessed with crypto, blockchain, and molecular cuisine. Maybe they know some things. But, in the real world, we ask more pertinent questions. Does it taste good? Does it have carbonation? Will enough of it get me drunk? So, don’t let jargon shake your confidence. If you have ever brewed tea, you can brew beer. It just takes a little longer before you can dink it.

This isn’t to say you ignore all the rules. You do need certain equipment and ingredients. And, there is a sequence of events to brewing. After all, what is beer? Water, malts, hops, and yeast. Everything else is simply variation. But, you do want to follow the right order of adding things. If you try adding yeast at the beginning, you will kill the yeast. The result is no alcohol or carbonation. And, if you start with hops, then add malt, you’re going to have some pretty bitter undrinkable crap. But, if you start with malt in hot water, add hops and flavoring, cool the liquid, and add the yeast, you’ll be drinking some primo ale in about a month.

What makes home Brew special?

If you remember the TV show “In living color”, A) you’re old, and, B) you remember it was funny. One of their best skits was Homey the clown. He showed up to kids’ parties and when kids would tell him to do things that clowns do, he would reply, “Homey don’t do dat.” He was no BS. He did things his way. And, that gave him a special “charm”. Of course, you wouldn’t want Homey at your kid’s party. But, as an adult, you could sit down and have a beer with him.

In a way, that’s a bit like Home brew (without the attitude). If you want a perfect clean, smooth beer that conforms to everything a beer “should be”, there are plenty of choices in the market. But, when you want something that can be itself, even when dressed in a clown suit, try a home brew. many micro-brews and even some larger scale breweries try to capture that home brew essence. But, none compare to the pride and flavor you create at home.

It’s often called small batch brewing. While Commercial brewers like Budweiser and Miller have tanks that hold over 2,000 gallons of beer; home brewers use 5 or 10 gallon bottles. Think of that compared to cooking. It would be like making a bowl of potato salad for 10 people vs making potato salad for multiple super markets. With your home made potato salad, you can pick, hand cut and, perfectly season each potato. When you mass produce, sack upon sack get dumped into a giant vat. There is no way to control all the ingredients. The same applies to brewing. When it comes to mass production: Homey Don’t Brew Like Dat.

So, how do Homey Brew?

Many local brewers and artisanal brewing companies start out as home brewers. And, when they are developing new recipes they usually do them on a small scale to replicate the home brew experience. The beauty of small scale brewing is the control over ingredients and the ability to experiment. Most commercial equipment is designed for precision measurement of ingredients, time, and temperature. It takes the human element out of the equation. You can get precision equipment for home brewing too. But, you can still manipulate it more easily. And, when dealing with a small batch, you can take risks with more expensive and higher quality ingredients. If you try something with $50 or $100 worth of ingredients, and it doesn’t come out the way you hoped, that’s not the end of the world. But, if you make 50 kegs of something that doesn’t work, you’re in trouble.

Now, you can buy some state of the art equipment to basically create a mini micro brewery in your home. But, for most of us, you can get all the equipment you need for under $200. If you shop around, you can even get by for under $100.

Equipment:

1. A large Pot for brewing, preferably around 20 quarts
2. 5 gallon Bucket, preferably with a spigot
3. Ingredient bags for putting malts in
4. Sparging bag for straining
5. 5 to 6 gallon carboy (Bottle for brewing, preferably glass. An old school glass water cooler bottle is best)
6. 1/2 in plastic tubing, two or more pieces several feet in long
7. 2 or 3 rubber stopper/corks with holes for the carboy
8. Airlock that will fit in the cork
9. Siphon starter
10. Bottle filler attachment that fits on 1/2 inch tube
11. Bottle capper
12. Equipment for washing bottles and carboys: Brushes, sprayer
13. Triple scale Hydrometer for measuring vitals of your beer
14. Sanitizer for your equipment

Most home brew supply companies and Amazon will sell you a starter kit with all the basics. Some kits don’t include a pot, because the assume you have one or you can get one from a kitchen store cheaper. The pot doesn’t have to be 20 quarts. But, I like a larger pot like that because when you are brewing, the wort often bubbles up. So, you need extra space to compensate for that without boiling over.

Brewing Styles:

For a successful brew you can take one of two approaches: All grain or extract brewing.

All grain requires brewing grains at a specific temperature and then cooling the “wort” with specialized equipment (Copper tubing that cold water is pumped through is one method). This method requires more grain than extract brewing. But, grains are cheaper and more versatile than extracts. You have more control over the final product. But, it is a more involved process.

Extract Brewing still uses grains in the initial boil. But instead of cooking the sugars down into a syrupy consistency, you use malt extracts either liquid or dry (or both) in the second part of the boil. Extracts are a distillation of grains made into a syrup, basically sugars. Liquid extracts are like molasses. Dry extracts are like sugar powders. The upside to extracts is that they are consistent and save some extra work. Plus, you can get a thicker body from them. They do tend to be pricey though. And, you lose some versatility in your brews. Extracts tend to come in only a few flavors, usually dark, light, or golden. On the other hand, they are easy to work with, and require less clean up. Plus, they are more forgiving than straight malts when it comes to temperature variations.

Purists often poo poo extract brewing. But, there is nothing wrong with it. If someone criticizes you, remind them: Homey Don’t Brew Like Dat.

Ingredients:

So, What do you need for ingredients? Well for starters: water. This shouldn’t really be an issue. But, depending on where you live, you may want to check the quality of your water. I mean, if you live in Flint Michigan, this could be a problem. But, using spring water is an option. Chances are, your water is neutral. But, if it has an off flavor, try a different source.

As for the rest of the ingredients, the variations are myriad. But, the basic concept is simple:

1. Grains/Malts: These come in a wide variety, They are the flavoring of the beer. While most are barley, you can use other grains as well, like sorghum, oats, corn, Millet and others. Some of these are Gluten Free. They don’t have the same effect as traditional barley. But, they can have their place. For our purposes (and for most brewers), these are considered fillers or adjuncts for flavor. For the most part, there are plenty of varieties in barley to come up with a tasty combination. You can get different roasts and varieties for everything from pilsner to Stout. The basic purpose of the grains is flavors and carbohydrates/sugars. This is what the yeast eats to create alcohol and carbonation. As mentioned above you can get whole grains or extracts.
2. Hops: These are the “bittering” agents. They are a plant related to cabanas. The buds have a variety of characteristics. They can add floral, citrus, herbal, or spice like characters to the beer. I usually use multiple varieties in each brew. There are some varieties you can boil for a long time, and others, that you add toward the end of the brew. And, if you want to add some during the fermentation process, this is known as dry hopping. They come in whole leaf and pellet form.
3. Yeast: Again, we have a wide variety of yeasts. Some people even grow their own strains, like you would do for sour dough bread, You get a strain, provide something for it to eat (like flour), and add it to the brew. yeast is an organic item that eats the sugars from the grains. The byproduct is alcohol and carbonation. There are hundreds of strains of yeast. And, they add to the flavor and complexity of the ale.

Clarifiers:

When you buy a commercial beer, it is clear and smooth. They filter out all impurities. Home brews tend to have some sediment in them. This can be annoying. So, you need to add ingredients that will capture and remove solids from the beer. Irish Moss is a standard clarifier. The process of clarifying is known as flocculation. Particles literally flock to the clarifying agent, which suspends them, so they can be easily removed. When you brew, you will see a couple inches of sediment in the bottom of your primary fermenting vessel (carboy). When you go to bottle, just avoid that while transferring from fermenter to bottle or keg. Also, use strainers: “sparging” bags and cheesecloth come in handy. Chances are, you won’t get it completely clear. But, that’s part of the charm of home brewing. If anyone complains, just tell them Homey don’t brew like dat.

Recipes? Kits? Homey don’t brew Like dat:

To make a home brew, you can either buy a kit with all the ingredients pre-measured or build your own.

Most kits are what we call clones. You try to emulate a beer created by someone else. All you do is follow the instructions with the hand selected ingredients, and you get your own version of a Sierra Nevada or whoever’s beer. Depending on copyrights, these are often sold under Pseudonyms like Pete’s “wacked” ale instead of Pete’s wicked ale. So, they tend to be similar, but never exactly the same. For first time brewers, these are an ideal place to start. You can experiment more later in life. Your home brew snobs will sneer derisively at using kits. This is because someone has done all the work and testing for you. Well, not everyone has hours and days of free time to develop beer recipes. So, just tell them: homey don’t brew like dat.

If you want to make your own recipes, just think of it like cooking. Read the characteristics of various malts, hops, and yeast. Talk to other brewers or workers at brew supply stores. And, think of it like cooking. Instead of proteins and vegetables, combine the ingredients that compliment or contrast well. If you want a darker ale, look for heavily roasted malts. Don’t be afraid to combine. But, before you start experimenting, I would recommend following someone else’s recipe to start. Once you get used to the process, you can switch out ingredients and recognize what works and what doesn’t.

The Process:

There are multiple steps to brewing. This is why a lot of people are intimidated by it. But, once you have tried it yourself, you will know, it’s not really that hard. It’s boil water, add ingredients, strain, ferment, bottle, and drink. You just need to familiarize yourself with the order in which things are added.

Day 1:

1. Bring water to a simmer. Add in malts. I usually put them in a brewing bag, like a giant tea bag. Steep the malts until the y impart their flavor and sugars. If you are doing all grain, you create what they call a “mash” so you don’t remove the “tea bag”. But, if you are using extracts, you do remove it.
2. Add extracts just like adding honey to your tea. Stir well to prevent scorching and to distribute the flavors. Bring to a boil or heavy simmer.
3. Add the first round of hops. These are the ones that add flavor, but aren’t considered bittering.
4. Toward the end of the brew, add finishing hops, the ones with the stronger, more pungent flavors. Also, add a clarifier at this time. This is usually in the last 5 to 15 minutes of the brew. It is often done in stages like add one hop at 15 minutes and another at 5.
5. Strain and cool the “wort” (this is the technical name for the brewing liquid).
6. Transfer to a carboy for primary fermentation. When cool enough, pitch the yeast and put a cork with a blow off tube on the carboy. Place in a dark area where it won’t be disturbed such as a closet. Have a container with a little water in the bottom to catch the “Blow off”. This is where the active fermentation creates what is called Krausen, a foam with sediment.

First week or 2:

After about 3 days, you will see the Krausen (pronounced croy-zen) settle down. This means that the yeast is through with it’s hyper phase. It is now safe to put an airlock on the bottle. Solids will settle to the bottom of the fermenter. This is why we recommend a glass carboy so you can see how the brew is proceeding. During the first week you can add adjunct flavoring or dry hops.

For most brews the primary fermentation process lasts about 2 weeks. Some processes take longer though, like when you are lagering, you want to have a lower temperature. Yeast works best at room to body temperature. So, if you ferment at 55 degrees it will definitely take longer for the yeast to do its job.

Bottling:

When yeast activity has slowed sufficiently, it is time to bottle. Or, for some people, it’s time to keg the beer. The process involved here is to transfer the beer to a bottling container (a 5 gallon or larger container). You should strain it at this time and be careful not to disturb the sediment in the bottom of the carboy. Stir in what we call priming sugar: about a cup of a sugar per 5 gallon batch, that will reactivate the yeast to create carbonation. Be careful not to add too much sugar or you could be looking at exploding bottles or hyperactive beer that foams out of the bottle upon opening.

Transfer the “primed” “wort” to your bottles or kegs and place them in a dark undisturbed area for another couple weeks so they have time to develop carbonation and their final characteristics.

Homey don’t brew like dat. But, he does get Better with age.

So, from start to finish, it generally takes about a month depending on what style of ale you are making. But, I have found that home brews change over time. So, I usually reserve a couple bottles to try at various stages of the life of the ale. Age changes ales. Sometimes they are best when they are fresh. But, some develop characteristics over time. I once made a chocolate mint ale using Ande’s candies. When I opened the first bottle, it was absolutely horrible. The mint and sugar overpowered everything. It was very discouraging. So, I hid the beer in a closet. About a year later, I opened one. It had completely mellowed. The flavors blended perfectly, and it was one of my favorite beers. So, before you throw out a batch, consider what it may become.

Again, if anyone complains about your home brew, try waiting. And, if they still want to tell you what to do, tell them: Homey don’t brew like dat.

Some recipes:

Check our previous posts for some fun beer recipes.

Here is our most recent home brew recipe.