Just Give Up Now
Procrastinators of the world unite: tomorrow. But, to all you quitters out there, we can’t put things off anymore. It’s time to take control of your slovenliness. It’s international Quitters day. So, whatever you’re doing, just give up now! Studies have shown that every new Year, people make resolutions. And, by the second Friday of the month, they give up or just let go of those resolutions. This is clearly evident if you spend any time at a gym. Every year, they are inundated with “tourists” for a couple weeks, then it’s back to the normal. So, if you’re feeling bad about not following through on your big plans, you’re not alone. Every year, millions of people quit, just like you. So, beat the crowds and just give up now.
Well, maybe you don’t have to be so hasty. Why is it that we give up so easily? Is it really that hard? We can come up with excuses all day. In fact, given the current propensity for people addicted to portable devices, we could blame them. It’s the ultimate in Short attention span. One problem with that: short attention span has existed for decades. Before the Daily show and Tick tock, we had a show called Short attention span theater in the 1990’s with a young John Stewart as one of the show’s hosts. They specialized in short clips of comedy acts interspersed with silly news headlines. And, if you want more examples, look no further than your dog and how you imitate their behavior:
The meaning of life can be summed up in one… Oh, look… Squirrel!
Table of Contents
So many reasons to Just give up now
Self help gurus and researchers always have a plethora of techniques to stay focused and organized. And, none of them work. They try to make them idiot proof. But, let me tell you: idiots are pretty smart. They find ways around the best made “no fail” plans. But, you don’t have to be an idiot to just give up now. It’s something that we all have the innate power to do. And, the beauty is, it takes little to no effort. There was a great Seinfeld scene where George proclaimed himself a great quitter, concluding: ” I was born to give up.”
But, we may have a way to short circuit the quitting gene. Since this is national quitters day, and we naturally want to quit, let’s make that our goal. And, if all goes according to precedence, we should actually succeed since we never attain our goals. By planning to give up, you make it more likely to actually follow through. It’s simple reverse psychology. If quitting is the right thing to do, we automatically do the opposite.
You won’t find this kind of advice in your self help books. There is a good reason for that. But, why not give it a try. If you plan to give up, you may just miss that deadline, as usual, and follow through for real.
Because we have to have goals
Job interviewers are famous for some pretty insipid questions. One of my favorite stupid questions is “where do you see yourself in 5 years”. To impress the interviewer, candidates often say things like “in your seat”, “running a multi-faceted corporation”, or “running my own operation.” It’s a silly question, intended to put you on the spot. The real answer, attained after 5 years, is usually sitting in this same seat at the 5th company in a row for many candidates. But, the underlying reason for the question is something we should all ask ourselves on a regular basis. Where do we want to be in 5, 10, 20 years? And, what do we need to do to achieve those goals?
And, if the answer is doing exactly what you’re doing now, you don’t need to be ashamed. Sometimes the life you lead is the life you want. When you start comparing yourself to others, that’s when you get the cognitive dissonance. Some people just have different levels of ambition and definitions of success. For some it’s having a family, a good job, or enough money to retire comfortably. Then there are people who want to rule and shoot for being the best at whatever their industry is. I worked with a guy who complained about the music I played in the kitchen, because the bands I listened to weren’t top 40 . He asked why try if you aren’t going to be the best? Well, that’s a pretty high bar. Maybe they do it for the love of the music or to express something important to them.
Don’t give up that easily
Maybe we resist resolutions because it goes against our natural instincts. Or, it could just be our natural tendency toward self sabotage. Low self esteem is one factor. But, plenty of people with an inflated view of themselves are also victims of their own failings. If you’re going to be the biggest name in your industry, it doesn’t mean you have to be the biggest A-hole too. But, some people give up on being nice to pursue their version of success.
So, quitters, you’re not alone. Even the biggest names in every industry are quitters too. It doesn’t mean we can’t try though. It’s when people tell us what to do or be that we resist. We have this independence streak in us that rebels against anything that isn’t our own idea (even if it actually is our idea), because we don’t want to be told what to do. I had a boss who wanted to do things his way. So, what we would do is use phrases like, “I loved your idea to do X, Y, Z”, even though it was my or one of my co-workers ideas. Getting the credit is less important than getting the job done.
perhaps that’s a better strategy to convince yourself to follow through. Don’t let others tell you what to do; but, frame the goal as something you want to do because it’s right for you. Just beware, the idiot within is still going to rebel, even against you. And, we all have the idiot within.
So, stop comparing yourself to others
I met Nick Soloman AKA The Bevis Frond at TT the Bears in Cambridge, MA a number of years ago. He is a multi-talented performer and producer, who plays, masters, and distributes his own music. I told him of my own ambitions by saying, ” I thought I could be a writer. Then I read James Joyce and said, ‘I’m Shit’. Then, I thought I could be a musician. But, I listened to the Bevis Frond and said ‘I’m Shit.’ “. He was taken aback by the statement. Even though it was meant as a compliment, he saw the fatal flaw in my thought process. He said, “no, man. You be you”. I was guilty of the same false narrative my former co-worker was. If you can’t be the best, don’t do it at all.
But, in reality, there is no such thing as the best. There are things that make the right statement at the right time. And, there are things that are wrong at a certain time, but may become right at others. Using our music metaphor, the Leonard Cohen Song Hallelujah was a flop at the time of its initial release. But, in the ensuing decades it became one of the most iconic ballads across multiple genres. Released in 1984, it lingered in obscurity until John Cale released a version in 1991. That version ended up in the movie Shrek, and inspired Jeff Buckley to release his haunting adaptation. Since then, there has been a flood of re-interpretations. And, upon his death in 2016, Cohen’s version finally broke the Billboard top 100.
Don’t Just Give up now.
The moral of this story is to do what you do. Even if it may flop now, there’s always a chance that it can have an impact somewhere down the line. Don’t fall for the quitter’s mantra: If you can’t be the best, don’t do it at all. Life is full of regrets. But, we can’t undo what’s been done or not done. All we can do is make the best decisions we can. At the same time, don’t become paralyzed with fear. If you miss a day at the gym, don’t consider that the time to quit for good. Go when you can. If you don’t lose the weight as quick as you want, don’t abandon the effort, go for more modest goals. Everybody does things at different paces. So what if it takes longer.
Don’t just abandon ship because of a modest setback. This is life, not a video game. If you miss a couple days, you don’t go back to square one. You build on your accomplishments. They say forgiveness is a virtue. Start by forgiving yourself. Then, instead of quitting, you can continue with your resolutions under a modified schedule. And, on that topic, don’t set your goals too high. Instead of saying I’m going to lose 30 pounds by March, how about 15 Pounds by May? I have a habit of making to do lists with 10 things for a day. Then, I get 4 done. Why not limit the list? It’s more rewarding crossing off a few things than rewriting them on the next day.
You can’t quit eating
So, here’s an idea for a resolution: do more home cooking. It’s something that is hard to avoid at least a modicum of success in. And, we have plenty of tips to help. Only cumin started with a philosophy of helping you cook restaurant quality food at home. And, we’re still here for you, even the Mageirocophobics in the audience. While there are many things to be afraid of in the Dangerous kitchen, as Frank Zappa so elegantly describes in his 1983 song. Making healthy, delicious, food isn’t something to fear. Respect the sharp objects, extreme temperatures, and the unseen dangers of micro-organisms. But, take pride in making your own food for yourself and/or family and friends.
Go ahead: give up on those unrealistic dreams: you’re not going to be the next Taylor Swift, Elon Musk, or Tom Brady. We already have too many of them to begin with. Those are goals better left to egomaniacs. Narcissism and assholiness are things that we wish more people would quit. But, if you want something you can follow through on, try this: cook at home. There is plenty of help, like our guidance right here. And, if you just don’t have the energy to do it every day, that’s fine too. But, make a modest goal to try it at least once a week. Even if it’s making a PB and J sandwich, you can make your own food at home.
Here are a couple recipes to get you started. And, remember, cooking is an art and a science. So, despite having some rules, you can put your own spin on any recipe. Avocado and Anchovy Ice Cream? Probably not, but who knows… it just might work. If not: quit making it.
Japanese Eggplant and Daikon Radish Salad with Miso Wasabi dressing
Ingredients
- 12 oz Japanese Eggplant
- 1 oz Sesame oil
- 1/4 tsp cracked black pepper
- 1 Tbsp Lime juice
- 1 tsp honey
- 1/2 tsp garlic chopped
- 1 tsp chopped fresh cilantro
- 1 Tbsp Soy Sauce
- 1/2 cup julienne daikon radish
- 1/2 cup Julienne English cucumber
- 1/4 cup julienne red bell pepper
- 2 cups Baby mizuna or other baby greens
- For dressing:
- 1/4 cup honey
- 1/4 cup Rice wine vinegar (Seasoned)
- 1 tsp Lime Juice
- 1 Tbsp Soy sauce
- 1/4 tsp chopped fresh garlic
- 1/2 tsp chopped fesh ginger
- 1 tsp wasabi powder
- 1/2 tsp Dijon mustard
- 1 Tbsp Miso paste
- 1/2 cup soy bean oil
- 2 Tbsp Sesame oil
Instructions
- Marinate the eggplant. make marinade: Mix Lime juice, sesame oil, honey, soy, cilantro, garlic, and black pepper. Split the Japanese Eggplant lengthwise and coat evenly with the marinade. Let sit in fridge about an hour or longer.
- Make the dressing by mixing all ingredients except oil in a blender or in a bowl . Turn on the blender or use a stick blender and slowly drizzle in the oil until the ingredients emulsify into a dressing. Set aside in the fridge until service time.
- Heat a pan over medium high heat. Sear the eggplant until caramelized (about 2 to 3 minutes). Then flip over and cook on other side for about the same amount of time. Turn off the heat and pour in the glaze. Let in coat the eggplant. But, be careful not to scorch it. That would leave a bitter taste and burn the product. Allow to cool. Then slice into diagonal cut shapes.
- At service time, Toss the vegetables together with some of the dressing. If there is extra dressing, it will hold for a couple weeks in the fridge. Serve imediately.
Notes
Mexican Chorizo and Corn Empanadas with Cumin Chili Sauce
Ingredients
- For Dough:
- 3 cups Flour
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 5 oz Melted coconut oil
- 1 cup water
- Filling:
- Avocado oil for cooking
- 4 oz chopped chorizo sausage
- 1/4 cup diced sweet onion
- 1/2 tsp chopped fresh garlic
- 1 Tbsp chopped fresh cilantro
- 2 Tbsp chopped fresh tomato
- 1/2 cup cooked corn, removed from the cob (preferably fresh, we grille ours)
- 1/4 cup Shredded cheddar or jack cheese
- 1/2 tsp ground cumin
- 1/4 tsp chili powder
- Salt and pepper to taste
- For Sauce:
- Avocado or olive oil to cook
- 1 cup fresh diced onion
- 1 tsp chopped fresh garlic
- 1 Tbsp chopped fresh jalapeno or chili of your choice
- 1 Tbsp ground cumin
- 1 tsp turmeric
- 1/2 tsp chili powder
- 1 oz tequila
- 1 each 28 oz can of crushed tomato
- 1 can water (the can from the tomatoes)
- Salt and pepper to taste
Instructions
- Make the dough: Either by hand or in mixer, using dough hook, combine flour and salt. Add in oil and water. Mix until a smooth dough is formed. It should be very pliable, but not wet or sticky. If too wet, add more flour. If too dry add more water. Lightly flour the dough and set aside, covered with plastic for about an hour. The gluten needs to relax.
- Make the sauce ahead of time as it takes a while to cook. Heat oil in a heavy pot, over high heat.. Add in garlic and onion. Cook and stir until translucent. Add the jalapeno and stir. Then add the tequila. Cook off the alcohol. Then add the remaining ingredients. Stir and bring to a boil. Then cut the temperature back to low to medium. You want a light simmer. Allow to simmer at least an hour, stirring occasionally. It should resemble pasta sauce when done.
- Make the filling: Saute the onion and garlic in heated oil until translucent (stirring occasionally). Add in the chorizo, and allow it to brown. Stir as needed. Add the spices and mix well. Remove from heat and add in the rest of the ingredients. Fold together until the mix sticks together. You should be able to make a ball of the mix.
- Make 8 to 16 balls out of the dough. Press them in a tortilla press or flatten by hand. Place a little bit of the filling in the center of each disk of dough. Then fold up the sides to create a half moon and crimp the edges to seal in the filling. Place them in a flat pan lined with parchment and spray with pan spray or use a silicone non stick pad. Place in a pre-heated 400 degree oven for about 15 to 20 minutes. They should become golden brown. Serve hot with the chili sauce.
Cumin Turmeric Rubbed Tilapia with Tomato Olive relish, Red lentils, and Lemon Grilled Artichokes
Ingredients
- 1.5 Lb Tilapia fillets 4 fillets about 6 ounces each
- 1/4 cup cumin and turmeric rub equal parts turmeric and cumin
- 1 whole lemon, zest and juice
- Salt and pepper to taste use for all parts of the dish
- olive oil to cook use for all parts of the dish
- For the relish
- 1 cup diced sweet onion
- 2 Tbsp chopped fresh garlic
- 1 Tbsp sugar
- 1 cup white wine
- 2 cups baby tomatoes cut in 1/2 lengthwise
- 1 Tbsp Julienne fresh basil
- 1 Tbsp Chopped fresh parsley
- 1/2 cup chopped castelvetrano or kalamata olives
- 1 Tbsp Lemon juice
Instructions
- Mix the spices, salt, pepper, and lemon zest in a bowl. Dredge the fish in the rub and allow to sit for 1 hour to let the spice infiltrate the fish.
- Make the relish: Heat olive oil over medium high heat in a saute pan. Add in the onion and garlic. Stir occasionally until they become translucent. Add in the sugar and let it melt.
- Add the tomatoes and stir. Then add the wine
- Reduce the liquid by 1/2, then add in the olives and lemon juice. Cook for 1 minute
- Remove from heat and add in the herbs, salt, and pepper
- Heat another pan with olive oil over medium high heat. Put the fish in top side down.
- Sear the fish about 2 to 3 minutes per side. Depending on the thickness, they should cook through pretty fast.
- Add a touch of lemon juice and let it reduce. Then remove the fish from the pan. Plate with red lentils and Artichokes and top the fish with the relsih. garnish with lemons and herbs.