Crank up the cranky
There’s at least one in every workplace: that person who is constantly upset, complaining, and a general downer to the operation. There’s no need to name them here (Sarah). Everyone knows them, and either tries to avoid them,ignore them, or calm or cheer them up. It’s the office grouch, curmudgeon, or Crank. Well, today is their day. It’s national Cranky coworker day. Time to crank up the cranky.
Recently, there was slap your irritating co-worker day. But, we didn’t want to condone violence. Instead, it’s the nice workers’ day to suffer. On this day, we try to let them get it out of their system. Just let them Bitch, bitch, bitch. Ear-pods are a wonderful thing for days like today. Slip them in, and let the tirade begin. Where you would usually try to assuage their complaints, just let them go. maybe, you can even pour some fuel on the fire. Hey, did you know that other guy who’s been here two weeks makes more money than you? Did you hear there is a moratorium against overtime? Oh, and the mandatory break will be deducted from your pay whether you take it or not?
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Why not crank up the cranky?
We all want to do it. Being cranky and speaking what’s on your mind can be liberating. But, when it’s every day, hour after hour… Just shoot me, now! So, maybe, today you could make a deal with your cranky co-worker. They can complain ad nauseam today. But, that’s it for the week. Conversely, maybe they have to shut up for the day. And, you can be the one complaining all day long. Give them a taste of their own medicine. Let them know what it sounds like and feels like to have to listen to this all day long.
If things suck so badly, why are you here? Oh, you’ve worked other places where it was worse? So, the grass isn’t greener? Or, maybe you worked elsewhere where things were great all the time? Why don’t you work there anymore? Oh, you complained when you were there too? Seems like the issue is you, not the work. It’s not that you can’t have a dim outlook. But, doing it all the time, just isn’t healthy. Sometimes you just have to accept things as they are. In the words of Dennis Leary: Life sucks, get a helmet!
What’s the root of the unhappiness?
Unfortunately, some people will never be happy. Humans have an innate survival technique where negativity helps. Prehistoric people needed to survive. When they go hunting, they need awareness of danger. So, a rustling of leaves becomes a sign of predators. Being vigilant was a matter of life or death. It’s all throughout nature. We can see it in the scattering of birds and wildlife when humans encroach their space.
In modern day, we still need some of that skepticism. If that plane overhead makes a weird noise, it’s about to crash. The squeal of tires indicates a car accident. We brace for the worst. Some people have a hyper vigilance for negativity. Everyone in my family suffers from a good amount of negativity. I can’t get that job because they want 10 years experience in a technology that’s only been around for 5. All of us miss opportunities because of this tendency. We call it examining all aspects of a situation. But, it’s top heavy on negativity.
While there is some nature to the phenomenon. Nurture plays a roll as well. Media companies capitalize on this. Watch the evening news. They never lead with “everything’s great in this wonderful world”. The top stories are shootings, wars, epidemics, crime, disasters, etc. In a 1/2 hour show you get 10 and things followed by that one nice “human interest story” about someone doing good. And, advertisers bombard us with all the things that are wrong. We all have ED, OCD, COPD, Bladder leakage, and incomplete coverage. It’s no wonder we’re all a little cranky. Some more than others.
How can we make your life better before you Crank up the cranky?
When your co-worker decides to crank up the cranky, don’t take it personally. It’s time to play psychotherapist. What seems to be the issue? Okay. How does that make you feel? Why do you believe this is affecting your performance? What can we do to make things better for you? Is this other person’s performance affecting your ability to do your job? What does their performance or treatment have to do with you performing your duties? Is there a way you can work within the system or create a pathway to work that results in less friction?
Of course, you just want to say, if you know everything, why don’t you just start your own business?
As the cranky cranks up, it creates an inhospitable environment. But, you can’t change their personality. You can, however, help them see there are reasons for things not going exactly as they want them to. Sometimes, it’s helpful to intervene in these ways. But, sometimes, the incessant chatter just becomes background noise. I had an employee who would drone on and on. Working in a kitchen I realized the tone of her voice was at a frequency similar to the exhaust fans over the cooking line. I could just listen to that, and, she would disappear into a cloud of white noise. People always asked me: how do you put up with her? There you have it.
Sometimes cranking up the cranky is a cry for appreciation
Some people don’t like to toot their own horn. So, they complain about others to make them look better in comparison. They won’t come right out and say, look what I did, they want you to notice it on your own. When you don’t, they become frustrated. Any parent recognizes this. Oh, great, honey, you blew a bubble. You did such a great job at that. This is the same obnoxious kid, now jaded by adulthood. I did all my work. And, I did it better than anyone else. Great. Here’s a gold star. Now keep working. And, no, you’re not getting a big raise unless you STFU!
Employee appreciation is a good thing, though. It can’t and shouldn’t be a constant thing. But, every once in a while, letting them know you see and appreciate them goes a long way. Doing team building and crap like that isn’t necessarily helpful. But, little gestures can make a difference. Bringing in donuts and coffee, or other little things like that go a long way. Ted Lasso brings his boss a little box of biscuits every morning. She thought they were store bought until she found out he made them himself. Yes. That’s special. You don’t have to be Ted Lasso to make something for your co-workers though.
May we suggest some ideas that may improve the atmosphere in work when they start to crank up the cranky? You can do this even if you have Mageirocophobia, a fear of kitchens. Here are some recipes:
Peanut Butter and Jelly Cookies
Ingredients
- 1 stick unsalted butter at room temperature
- 1 cup smooth peanut butter
- 1/2 cup packed brown sugar
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 2 cups AP flour
- 1 Tbsp baking soda
- 2 large eggs
- 1 cup Jam, pick your favorite flavor. Raspberry is preferred, but any will do. Just make sure it is thick enough to stand up to baking and not run.
Instructions
- Preheat the oven to 350.
- Mix the flour, salt, and baking soda in a separate bowl.
- Beat the butter, peanut butter, and sugars in a mixer with a paddle attachment until it is smooth and well blended. Scrape down the sides and paddle as needed.
- With the mixer running, add the eggs one at a time and mix well. Then add the vanilla.
- Add the flour mix a little at a time on low speed to prevent it from flying all over. Mix in well until a smooth dough forms.
- Scoop dough onto a pan with a non stick pad or wax paper or parchment paper sprayed with pan spray. Press down the dough balls to form a thick disk. Push your thumb or finger into the middle of the cookie and put jam in the indentation.
- Bake at 350 degrees for 12 to 15 minutes until the cookies have browned up and are crisp.
Notes
Caramel Rum Blondies
Ingredients
- 1 Cup Unsalted Butter
- 1 1/4 Cup Brown Sugar
- 3/4 Cup White sugar
- 2 Large Eggs Room temperature
- 1 Large Egg Yolk room temperature
- 1 Tbsp Vanilla extract
- 2 Cups AP Flour, may substitute cake flour if available for a lighter bar.
- 1 tsp baking powder
- 1/2 tsp Salt
- 2 Cups White chocolate chips
- Pan spray
- Turbinado sugar for dusting the pan
- For Caramel:
- 1 Cup Turbinado Sugar
- 1/4 Cup Rum
- 1/2 Cup Heavy Cream
Instructions
- Make the Caramel: Heat sugar in a pan over medium heat. Allow it to melt and brown, Stir as needed. Add in the rum and burn off the alcohol. Add the Cream and stir until well blended. Reduce liquid until it becomes a thick caramel. Allow to cool.
- Preheat oven to 375.
- Mix the flour, baking soda, and salt in a bowl, set aside.
- Melt the butter over medium heat. Transfer to a mixer and whisk in the Sugars and vanilla. Add in the eggs, one at a time with the whisk running. Slowly add in the flour mix a bit at a time so that it doesn't fly everywhere. Continue mixing until well incorporated. Then fold in the White Chocolate Chips.
- Spray a 9×13 sheet pan or baking dish with pan spray. Sprinkle in turbinado sugar and turn and shake the pan until it is evenly coated with sugar. Fill the pan with batter. Spread it out evenly. Then drizzle the caramel on top. You can swirl the caramel into the batter with a fork or toothpick to make nice designs.
- Bake for 25 to 30 minutes until it firms up and gets a nice crust. Allow to cool at least an hour. Then cut into bars.
Tipsy Xocolatl (Aztec Chocolate)
Ingredients
- 1 Quart Light Cream
- 2 Small Hot Chili Peppers
- 2 Tbsp Agave syrup
- 1 each vanilla Beans, split open
- 2 Cups Baking chocolate or chocolate chips
- 2 3 inch Cinnamon Sticks
Instructions
- Place all ingredients except chocolate in a pot over medium heat. Bring to a simmer. Allow to steep for about 5 minutes so the vanilla, chili, and cinnamon have time to flavor the cream. Then whisk in the chocolate. Be careful to make sure it all melts evenly.
- Strain out the vanilla, cinnamon, and chilies. Serve hot. You can top with whipped cream and cinnamon sugar if desired.